P251 ORACLE 251 Sun 6 Aug CEN 0254:10 Small's 1/6 by Jack Small IT'S GETTING hard to distinguish which is more transparent in Home And Away - characters, plots or scenery? On Friday, in a plot "development" you could see light through, bad boy Brett charmed his way into Celia's good books who, only minutes before, regarded him as public enjmz No1. The scene was as convincing as a get-well-soon letter from Dr Crippjn. Talking about scenery, does Morag enjoy living somewhere that looks like a hotel foyer? I'm surprised her hideous flat doesn't have revolving doors. more > TV Plus Guide 250 TellyQuiz 252 TellyQuiz RSVP:tv TV Charts TV GuideP251 ORACLE 251 Sun 6 Aug CEN 0208:42 Small's 2/6 by Jack Small ORNERY PEOPLE keep doing exornery finks in Frank Bruno's People (BBC1 Thu). Apart from foghorn Frank's interviewing technique, which involves jabbing questions at all the wrong times, it warn't as toe-curlingly embarrassing this week as it has been in the past. In fact it was quite watchable. Best value for money were the white witch NIMBYs (Not In My Back Yards) of Hastings, who were casting a spell to stop an oil company drilling in their nick of the woods. more > TV Plus Guide 250 TellyQuiz 252 THINKING OF BUYING A NEW CAR? p190 TellyQuiz RSVP:tv TV Charts TV GuideP251 ORACLE 251 Sun 6 Aug CEN 0204:05 Small's 3/6 by Jack Small BBC1's FADING cockney capek, EastEndjrs (remember it?) went wild recently and brought in a load of fresh, young characters. Unfortunately they've all turned out to bj twice as gloomy as Ali, Pete, Arfur and the other Albert Square smilers. My favourite is Paul, obviously a student of the Brian Tilsley School Of Real-Life Drama, whose purpose seems to be to lift heavy things and remove his T-shirt with monotonous regularity. The only soap star to be out-acted by his own pectorals. more > TV Plus Guide 250 TellyQuiz 252 TellyQuiz RSVP:tv TV Charts TV GuideP251 ORACLE 251 Sun 6 Aug CEN 0218:54 Small's 4/6 by Jack Small TOP OF THE POPS (BBC1 Thu) threw up some interesting contrasts this week. Kylie Minogue mimed vacuously through a dirge backed bz a team of dancers like tic-sac men on drugs, while the fresh-faced chap from The Lightning Seeds sang about sleigh rides and shooting stars in a song called "Pure". It was left to one-man Rocky Horror Show Alice Cooper to stand up for all that's bad and dishonourable in pop. His "Poison" video was a masterpiece of sado-masochistic chic and appalling bad taste. more > TV Plus Guide 250 TellyQuiz 252 TellyQuiz RSVP:tv TV Charts TV GuideP251 ORACLE 251 Sun 6 Aug CEN 0219:53 Small's 5/6 by Jack Small IMAGINE Bernard Manning's sense of humour packaged in the superstructure of a Page Three model and you'vj got Ellie Lainj, comedienne. One Day (BBC2 Tue) watched her prepare for a gig at a nightclub described, quite rightly, by another comedian on the same bill, as the "inside of an MFI wardrobe." Male and female members of the audience loved her X-rated jokes, which were almost exclusively about the male mjmbjrs' male mjmbjrs. It all sjemjd out of character for stuffy old BBC2. more > TV Plus Guide 250 TellyQuiz 252 TellyQuiz RSVP:tv TV Charts TV GuideP251 ORACLE 251 Sun 6 Aug CEN 0258:12 Small's 6/6 by Jack Small TV TWIT OF THE WEEK "He played with great effort yesterday. He played with his head." Richie Benaud commentating on Geoff Lawson's performance on the first day of the 4th test. Rajbinder Sahota of Derby wins this week's tenner for spotting this classic goof. BLUNDER HUNTERS! All TV goofs etc. gratefully received. Write to TV TWIT OF THE WEEK, JACK SMALL, TV PLUS, ORACLE, 25-32 MARSHALL ST, LONDON W2V 1LL. £10 prize if I use your nomination Home And Away > TV Plus Index 250 TellyQuiz 252 TellyQuiz RSVP:tv TV Charts TV Guide